MEMORANDUM

TO: NOW Activists

FROM: Patricia Ireland, Rosemary Dempsey, Kim Gandy and Karen Johnson

RE: National Day of Action in Support of Same-Sex Marriage

DATE: December 4, 1996

Any day now, a court in Hawaii is expected to hand down a decision in the same-sex marriage case, Baehr v. Miike. While we are hoping for a favorable ruling, any decision will certainly be appealed, with the final outcome delayed for at least two years. Two years is too long to be silent about the injustice faced by lesbian and gay couples on a daily basis.

We are writing with an appeal for action next Valentine's Day weekend. To send lawmakers a message that traditional boxes of candy and heart-shaped cards aren't enough, NOW is coordinating a National Day of Action in support of same-sex marriage to demand legal recognition of lesbian and gay relationships. Delegates at NOW's 1996 National Conference in Las Vegas overwhelmingly passed a resolution encouraging NOW chapters nationwide to organize actions near February 14 to promote the national campaign. This community-based effort is an opportunity for us to speak out publicly and act together to show support for lesbians and gay men in loving relationships who are denied the same rights and responsibilities as married heterosexual couples.

The education that we can provide with these actions is crucial. Lesbians and gay men are often turned away at the hospital when a partner has suffered an accident or illness. Their families are torn apart. Their children are taken away. They are subjected to pervasive discrimination because they can't get married. From health insurance to child custody, same-sex couples are second-class in the eyes of the law and society.

Marriage is both a cultural and legal recognition of relationships that provides many rights and responsibilities to couples who choose to marry. Denying that personal and individual choice to lesbian and gay people is just as discriminatory as denying people of different races the right to marry, as this country did until a 1967 Supreme Court decision ruled that ban unconstitutional.

As the first feminist organization to join the National Freedom to Marry Coalition, NOW has been firmly committed to securing same-sex marriage rights. NOW's National Board declared support for same-sex marriage in 1995 and NOW activists across the country have battled anti-marriage legislation in 37 states. Of the anti-marriage bills introduced, 20 are dead, 16 have been enacted, and one is pending.

We must stand united against discrimination and in support of strengthening diverse families. Winning the right to marry is not a victory in and of itself, but a vehicle for building the power to create a society in which all of us can choose and protect our families ourselves, free of discrimination.

This action kit is designed to assist your organizing efforts. It is by no means exhaustive, but includes the following information:

Please be sure to contact Kimberlee Ward, Lesbian Rights Program Director, at the Action Center if you have any questions or need more information about this project. Also, please send us news clips of your chapter's actions.

Thank you for all of your efforts. We look forward to continuing our work with you on this issue.